Blim or Bust

Have you read the new Harry Potter? I have. I wasn't going to, or at least not till there was a copy at the library I didn't have to get up too early to bag. But then the pope spoke out against it, and I damn near bought two (£8.97 in Sainsbury's, so reasonable and Nectar points too). In the name of the Institute for the Statement of The Bleeding Obvious, by the powers of Sybil Fawlty and Sir Sir Richard, I feel I must say:
OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE!
Please someone tell me why the man who is MEANT to be the highest authority in a religion supposedly based on the all conquering power of pure love has nothing better to do in these hideous painful days than to pick on a children's book? I rather feel that it should be beneath his notice. I also hazard that he has not read it, as dubbing it 'unchristian' makes no sense if you have. For non-Potterites I shall explain that Rowling at no point makes any claim for or explanation of where the magic powers that the characters have come from. Not a dickie bird. So it's not like it's a pagan book. I would also point out that the people who use their magic for bad or selfish purposes are portrayed as bad people, and those that are portrayed as good people only usetheirr powers within the law and for good. There is also emphasis on being able to love giving a person greater power than any dark magic. And as it happens, given aforementioned rough times, the book is about evil people terrorising the good and those who are entirely innocent, and the way people can support each other through those times and seek to overcome that evil. For a child asking mummy at bedtime what the meaning of what they have seen on the news is, for a child afraid, the best mode of explanationIi can think of would be to use this very book as a base for explanations.
For Is It Not Written, Mr. Pope, in that book of yours which is the only one that seemingly still has sold more copies than Harry Potter, that your Lord did tell FICTIONAL STORIES unto the people that they might better understand the point he was trying to make? Hmmmmmmm? And is it not the case that any story employing values compatible with Christianity might be read at bedtime, discussed with the child in question, put in context by a Christian parent, then say your prayers and go to sleep please for it is a school night?
I think that rather than pick holes in the books that have made a generation of readersoutt of a bunch of kids who looked set to grow thumbs the size of spades from too much Playstation, or continuing to propagate misinformation about other religions, the pope might try using his influence to spread peace? He could even go right out on a limb and start talking to the likes of Mugabe about the firey fate he no doubt believes awaits him.
Oh oops I forgot- Mugabe can do what he likes as long as he says sorry afterwards.
And while we're about it, by the way, as there's abeautifull example to use,Ii would like to clear up the following once and for all:
If you were to say that the suicide bombers are to Isalm what satanists are to Christianity, ie same texts, God and dramatis personnae, totally opposite outlooks gleaned from that, then if Pagans would be to Christianity what Hindus are to Islam. Totally different religion, don't believe in any of the same gods, myths etc.
There is also a little nuther issue: martyrs. I hear much about people choosing to bemartyrss for Islam (Satanic equivalent division). I'm not sure you can choose to be a martyr. I rather thought you had to be put in a position by a third party in which you had to choose to betray your religion or die. And so from a thousand tortured women dying slowly in one of the most hideous possible ways, I'd like to say to these 'elective martyrs' "You LUCKY bastards! You lucky, lucky bastards. You get a choice! We never did."
So to The Pope: In these times of awfulness, remember what your church did to previousreligiouss groups who were demonized by theofficiall sources of information, focus upon what needs to be done that you might be one of only a handful of people in the world who might be able to achieve, read your bible and try to use your influence to promote tolerance, understanding and love, and suffer the little children to read what they like. Or roll up a big fat spliff.
Cos at the moment,Iidon'tt like you at all.

My Cousins Were Right All Along

Fucking Yorkies should all be rounded up and shot.

Fia8co

After Live8 I am aware:
That British Music (that being what is liked by, as well as what is produced by British people) is in the most desperate state for twenty years.
That against all odds Slash has found someone to stand on a stage with who is more odious than Axl Rose.
That Ricky Gervais isn’t funny, just a really deeply unpleasant person.
That Robbie Williams must be stopped.

I remain unaware of:
Where to get a ‘Make Poverty History’ wristband. Between myself and the two dozen odd people in the office we have eliminated all the usual suspects (Sainsbury’s, Woolies, Boots, Tesco).
Why it is so difficult to get a wristband if the point of all this was raising awareness.
Which shop chain would have (cannot be did or you bet we’d have heard about it) refused to carry the wristbands.
Why there was a tactic of making public Live8 events ticket only.
Why there was such pleasure taken in the elitist “If you haven’t got ticket, you wont hear a note” attitude.
Why Live8 didn’t organize free big screens in public parks all over the city (with stalls for petitions and information etc), so that families and friends could have all joined together and watched the events with a picnic, and covered the country with large crowds of aware people for the news to film.
Why in fact Make Poverty History screens weren’t set up for people to watch Glastonbury and Wimbledon then Live8. All sorts of people would have been attracted by that.
Why there was not a Make Poverty History presence at every single sporting and cultural event that weekend.
Why, if Geldof doesn’t want our money this time, he didn’t ask for our time instead? Properly organized a Time Bank would have allowed the screens with information stalls, event presences and far far more.
Why, as aid is not the point of Live8, Geldof and his rich powerful friends haven’t started a company to provide affordable credit to African small businesses? They could sell shares in the company, which we could buy or club together to buy, and what we invest could be given directly to the people who can really make a difference on the ground in Africa, rather than to corrupt governments. Long term change is necessary, but that doesn’t stop us trying to do something now surely?
Why, with all the money, resources, famous/high profile/rich/powerful people, media influence and goodwill available to him and his cause, Mr. Geldof decided to organize a pop concert.

I very much feel that all the new and important information I have recently acquired about the problems of Africa has come from the BBC news, not from Live8. I feel that the only awareness really raised was about Live8 itself and the people involved. And most of all I feel that with all that needs doing, and all that could have been done, it was feeble, self-congratulatory and almost counter productive to organize a mere pop concert. If Geldof had stood there and asked for my time, be it handing out Make Poverty History information leaflets at Wimbledon, packaging mosquito nets for Kenya, whatever, with the passion with which he asked for our money twenty years ago, I’d have given it gladly, and I bet you woulda too.

Sincerely Pissed Off Of London

I really didn't need another reason to hate living here, did I? As it happens I've been rather busy lately hating the assignment my temping agency have currently got me on, so much of my general russum has been taken up there. It's rubbish money, I've been just barely trained to do anything at all, then alternately left with nothing to do (but no internet access except at lunchtime) or left to do things I have no actual hope of doing due to not having been trained to do them. I am really really fed up with it.
Then some cunt lets a bomb off underneath it.
I was really not pleased. To begin with the job was making it worse. With the attitude typical of schools and other such jobsworth institutions we were getting the "I don't care what's going on, settle down we've got work to do" etc etc. "But" we might well have said, "whatever's just happened has happened directly underneath and all around us." We might have said "Observe the large, slightly shaken and rather pissed off Scotsman who was blown off his feet coming out of the station, observe the people coming back from fag breaks saying the end of our road is a police cordon. Might it not be a good idea to get out of here?"
"But" the manager in our office reported the guy upstairs saying "I don't care if a bomb's gone off, I want to get the exam results out."
Well I Fucking Well Do care if a bomb's gone off. As, fortunately, did my temping agency. So I picked up my stuff and walked out of there, and I didn't stop till I got home two hours later. I couldn't get in touch with my husband until i was most of the way home. If I'd stayed put it would have been hours longer. I don't give a rats arse who thinks I work for them, if I'm not comfortable being in a place, let alone if everything I know tells me it's the single stupidest place I could be, I'll take myself out of it buy whatever means necessary.
Today the permanent staff here are trying to get those results out. Unfortunately as is usual if anyone tries to do anything more ambititous than turn it on, the system's playing up. It doesn't care if people are waiting for exam results. I'm here, and I'm even less bloody happy about it than I was before. So here are my revised rules in the light of Thursday:
I will not go into London wearing anything I can't run in.
I will not travel on the tube at peak times.
I will not travel in at all without my disaster kit (First aid kit, water, maglite and batteries, suitable face covering cloth, in case jumper, spare socks, A-Z, Swiss Army Knife, watch)
If I say I'm outa here, I'm outa here.
If I'm a temp, I work for me. If you want me to do something, it's your responsibility to make it possible.
If I'm temping for you, you only get to tell me what work to do, nothing else.
If you want to blow me up, you'll have to fucking catch me first.

I will not be pandering to those responsible by giving them any airtime.